What Choice will you make?

[mightyreds185]

Hi all,

I am writing to ask for the general opinion here in the forum.

The gist of it: Which Job will you choose?

1) Local listed company: Pay package S$120k (not including bonus) per annum, pay rises will be minimum for the next 2 years.

2) Overseas company: Pay package S$150k (not including bonus) per annum, with a high possibility of significant salary increase (>50%) within 1-2 years. The catch here is that time spent overseas will be more than 90% for the foreseeable future. One month can only be back for 2-3 days for about 1-2 years.



Background and Other points for consideration:

1) Age 34. Married with a young kid less than 2 years old and another baby on the way.
2) 2 properties (1 paid up and 1 property still with a loan of >500k)
3) Wife has given her blessing to work overseas
4) Wife has a stable job which is also not bad paying (>S$100k per annum)

I have given the above so that any views can take into account all salient factors (ie family make up, age, loans, earning power etc).

I appreciate all sincere viewpoints and advices.

PS: I am very attached to my little one.

[yowetan]

Hi all,

I am writing to ask for the general opinion here in the forum.

The gist of it: Which Job will you choose?

1) Local listed company: Pay package S$120k (not including bonus) per annum, pay rises will be minimum for the next 2 years.

2) Overseas company: Pay package S$150k (not including bonus) per annum, with a high possibility of significant salary increase (>50%) within 1-2 years. The catch here is that time spent overseas will be more than 90% for the foreseeable future. One month can only be back for 2-3 days for about 1-2 years.



Background and Other points for consideration:

1) Age 34. Married with a young kid less than 2 years old and another baby on the way.
2) 2 properties (1 paid up and 1 property still with a loan of >500k)
3) Wife has given her blessing to work overseas
4) Wife has a stable job which is also not bad paying (>S$100k per annum)

I have given the above so that any views can take into account all salient factors (ie family make up, age, loans, earning power etc).

I appreciate all sincere viewpoints and advices.

PS: I am very attached to my little one.

Interesting example.

[phantom_opera]

Have you heard of babies requires touch of father to grow in a healthy manner? Absence of father normally means the boys are normally timid and has no self-confidence

There are certain things that money won't buy

Enough said

[carbuncle]

TS. You already have the answer. You just need others to tell it to your face. I wont do you that benefit. Really waste our time...

I leave you with this thought.

Money earned cant buy back the lost years of your kids childhood.

[buttercarp]

TS, I will go abroad only if the whole family goes along.
Otherwise it is a definite NO.

[Regulators]

Family comes first of course. Your two kids are still so young and your wife needs your moral support in every way. I would go for the local option, that extra bit of cash you can find creative ways to make it elsewhere.

[mightyreds185]

To Buttercarp,

Unfortunately, no. The family will not be going along. But i will shift back to Singapore in 1-2 years time.

To Carbuncle and Phantom Opera,

Appreciate your responses. You guys seems to think that family life is much more important than securing a better future for the whole family by taking a short term sacrifice.

The fact that i am asking means i am still agonising over the decision.

Actually, i am leaving in an hours time to sign that overseas contract.

Having thought through my decision for 2 weeks, i am still none the wiser.

Nonetheless, i do appreciate your frank responses.

[yowetan]

I will go for the money since I am already broke.

I think you want the above reply to back you up.

[mightyreds185]

Family comes first of course. Your two kids are still so young and your wife needs your moral support in every way. I would go for the local option, that extra bit of cash you can find creative ways to make it elsewhere.

To Regulators,

I understand that. But my wife actually wants me to take the overseas option as the value-add is much more significant than the local option.

Also, we are lucky in the sense of having a fantastic support network in the form of both sets of our parents.

[hopeful]

if you can control your cock, then by all means go overseas to work.
if cannot, then economy damage would be more than the differential earned. an example, US oil workers who worked in asia, they blow their salary on hookers, girlfriends etc.

with all high speed internet + video conferencing, your kids can respond to 2 stimuli, voice and sight, albeit no touch, smell and taste of you.
I suggests once overseas, you send your unwashed clothes back to your family, for your kids to smell when they are asleep. It really works.

Since your immediate relatives support you,seize the opportunity la. Who knows will come knocking again?
This IMO is a no-brainer question.

PS. you are attached to your little one, But you should be concerned about the little one's future.

[carbuncle]

Money is the root of all suffering indeed. I fail to see how horrid a quality of life can be had with combined household income 250k pa. TS is not striving to form a soccer team.

Wife says Yeah. But are kids old enough to say NAY? They are the ones to suffer most. Strong parents network...hahaha... Poor souls, brought you guys up slogging now have to slog some more for your kids. If you have that much overseas earning maybe can employ dedicated nanny one each for your kids. Spare your old parents please. Oh dont forget send them on cruise holidays or japan onsen vacations with all that extra money you have....

[JohnTan]

To Regulators,

I understand that. But my wife actually wants me to take the overseas option as the value-add is much more significant than the local option.

Also, we are lucky in the sense of having a fantastic support network in the form of both sets of our parents.

In terms of demographics am in quite a similar situation as yourself.

I will take the overseas job if wife gives blessings. Unfortunatley no one wants to send me overseas for 2 years

[mightyreds185]

Money is the root of all suffering indeed. I fail to see how horrid a quality of life can be had with combined household income 250k pa. TS is not stiving to form a soccer team.

To Carbuncle,

Understood what you are trying to tell me. Money has always been the root of all evil. Definitely the choice is mine to make.

I guess its just to see whether the general opinion is really to choose family over a chance to be even more comfortable in life. (Before you tell me that there will be no end about chasing after money, i am keenly aware of that).

[rattydrama]

Just be careful that you will still get a good paying job when return. Make sure all promises are in the contract. I do encounter some colleagues after they finished their overseas assignment found that due to restructing, management has changed and they are forced to up root elsewhere. Particuly so when economy is bad.

Also overseas ladies are aggressive........ and you wont know what will happen to your wife...

[JohnTan]

To Carbuncle,

Understood what you are trying to tell me. Money has always been the root of all evil. Definitely the choice is mine to make.

I guess its just to see whether the general opinion is really to choose family over a chance to be even more comfortable in life. (Before you tell me that there will be no end about chasing after money, i am keenly aware of that).

I will always choose short term sacrifices in exchange for long term gain.

[gn108]

Money no enough.

The answer is trade-offs! The new buzz word I learn from out MiW.

The Career-minded cannot stand-still...must always be willing to carry flag and do extra. Else someone else will come and steal your seat. So if he wants to earn >250k pa, he must go with MNC.

Stand-still with local company, will allow for family time but the risk of 'relative stagnation' in time is higher.

So what is enough for you? And how ambitious/scared are you?
Trade-offs...you and family must know and then cast your vote!

[carbuncle]

To Carbuncle,

Understood what you are trying to tell me. Money has always been the root of all evil. Definitely the choice is mine to make.

I guess its just to see whether the general opinion is really to choose family over a chance to be even more comfortable in life. (Before you tell me that there will be no end about chasing after money, i am keenly aware of that).

I guess if its just 2 yrs, the risk is small. Go for it! Be happy with your decision.

[hopeful]

To Carbuncle,

Understood what you are trying to tell me. Money has always been the root of all evil. Definitely the choice is mine to make.

I guess its just to see whether the general opinion is really to choose family over a chance to be even more comfortable in life. (Before you tell me that there will be no end about chasing after money, i am keenly aware of that).

right you, you and spouse are talented in getting good jobs + good salary.
are you sure your kids will have the same talents?

are your parents rich? if yes and you are rich, then chances your kids have money making dna will be good.

if your parents not rich, then chances your kids have that money making dna not so good.
so what can you do as parents? make money while you can, not for your sake, but for their sake.

[carbuncle]

Money no enough.

The answer is trade-offs! The new buzz word I learn from out MiW.

The Career-minded cannot stand-still...must always be willing to carry flag and do extra. Else someone else will come and steal your seat. So if he wants to earn >250k pa, he must go with MNC.

Stand-still with local company, will allow for family time but the risk of 'relative stagnation' in time is higher.

So what is enough for you? And how ambitious/scared are you?
Trade-offs...you and family must know and then cast your vote!

Ya la ya la. Choose whether wanna be struck by lightning or crushed by hammer. Neither is good... Both are evil.

[hopeful]

Just be careful that you will still get a good paying job when return. Make sure all promises are in the contract. I do encounter some colleagues after they finished their overseas assignment found that due to restructing, management has changed and they are forced to up root elsewhere. Particuly so when economy is bad.

Also overseas ladies are aggressive........ and you wont know what will happen to your wife...

now iphone and other smart phones have location tracking apps. so to build trust, make sure answer video calls and activate the location apps.

[carbuncle]

I will always choose short term sacrifices in exchange for long term gain.

Sure. But some short term sacrifice may cause long term damage. It takes far more foresight to catch.

[mightyreds185]

Alright guys,

Been reading the forum for 2 years and it my virgin post.

Its just a last minute thing to see whether anyone has any unique viewpoint.

Thank you for your time and opinions, regardless of whether its for the money or the family.

[Laguna]

I was away for a month only when my both children were only 5 and 2.
It was heart breaking to part.

It is not going to be easy for your wife.

[hopeful]

Alright guys,

Been reading the forum for 2 years and it my virgin post.

Its just a last minute thing to see whether anyone has any unique viewpoint.

Thank you for your time and opinions, regardless of whether its for the money or the family.

how about money for the family?

[rattydrama]

...LIKE... you sum it all.

if you can control your cock, then by all means go overseas to work.
if cannot, then economy damage would be more than the differential earned. an example, US oil workers who worked in asia, they blow their salary on hookers, girlfriends etc.

[insigina]

Alright guys,

Been reading the forum for 2 years and it my virgin post.

Its just a last minute thing to see whether anyone has any unique viewpoint.

Thank you for your time and opinions, regardless of whether its for the money or the family.

Here's my 2 cents...Go for the overseas company. I have been working for foreign companies and local companies. Hands down the former. The work culture and regard for personal/family life is generally better with foreign companies, not to mention the overall package. Besides you are only 34. The experience you gain from overseas posting is going to be invaluable. If your posting is within Asia, even better as you and family can link-up over long weekends, etc.

[Stingray]

There is no right or wrong choice but more of important is what you think is important. Yes, money is important but it cannot buy happiness. Even though you have support from parents but they cannot replace you. Father is also an important role for children. Why most children from single parent background are not healthy in psychologically?

Yes, it maybe 2 years but it is also not short especially for people waiting for the time to pass.

Before, I also become a parent, many of my colleague advice me to spend more time with my kid before they grow up. I'm lucky to have the opportunity to spend alot of my time with my kid and she is a very happy child. I have a small shop manage by my wife while I try to take care of my kid if I am not needed in the shop. I can tell you that I am so happy to sacrifice my time for my child than trying to earn more money.

Life is not about money. Like your parents, you can give them a lot of money this is not what they want. They want your companion. I believe your children are too young to tell you. They want your companion and not just money. If money can replace you then you should be worry for your children. When you are old, your children will not be by your side as they would be busy to slave for money. Your children will learn from you that money is more important than anything else including relationship.

I just share my thoughts but you do consider before signing it. Wish you all the Best!

[DC33_2008]

It has to be at least double of $150k to make the sacrifice. In fact, the aluable time with family especially with the new born can never be tagged to a number. It will not return once that stage is past.

Hi all,

I am writing to ask for the general opinion here in the forum.

The gist of it: Which Job will you choose?

1) Local listed company: Pay package S$120k (not including bonus) per annum, pay rises will be minimum for the next 2 years.

2) Overseas company: Pay package S$150k (not including bonus) per annum, with a high possibility of significant salary increase (>50%) within 1-2 years. The catch here is that time spent overseas will be more than 90% for the foreseeable future. One month can only be back for 2-3 days for about 1-2 years.



Background and Other points for consideration:

1) Age 34. Married with a young kid less than 2 years old and another baby on the way.
2) 2 properties (1 paid up and 1 property still with a loan of >500k)
3) Wife has given her blessing to work overseas
4) Wife has a stable job which is also not bad paying (>S$100k per annum)

I have given the above so that any views can take into account all salient factors (ie family make up, age, loans, earning power etc).

I appreciate all sincere viewpoints and advices.

PS: I am very attached to my little one.

[indomie]

Which country u are heading to?. It will give us a better idea what kind of situations u will be expecting.

[ysyap]

I will stay... the memories that the child collects starts from 2 years old. These memories will be without the father... Anyway, the difference in salary is only $30k, not $3mil so I'll stay put! Do not be blinded by the notion that you can save $0.50 per pack of drinks by buying an entire carton but you actually don't need so much drinks... you wanted to save but in the end spend more. You wanted to earn more money for family but in the end lost the time for your family. Well, your kid might have preferred your presence more than the extra cash. Furthermore, your next baby's on the way and your wife will definitely need you around too for that emotional support!